When I say the courage to try new things I mean BOLD COURAGE to try things that light your heart on fire. Try the new thing because your soul is longing to pursue a life with more purpose and passion.
Try that new thing because you a have this deep calling within you for growth, for change or for the thrill of the adventure? Yet, you remain living the status quo, staying stuck in order to stay safe, to stay comfortable?
Or maybe you have arrived at an unexpected change in your life creating a window of opportunity to try the new thing? But damn, change can be hard.
It is very uncomfortable to change. It is very uncomfortable to do new things. It's very uncomfortable to risk failure and rejection, and here's why: your brain creates thoughts and meaning whenever you do any of these things.
And those thoughts that come up can create so much discomfort that it literally increases our heart rate, our palms get sweaty, our knees shaky.
You might notice physical sensations within you as I say this….
tightness?
expansion?
Heart beat increasing or decreasing?
-OR-
You might notice feeling…
Optimistic?
Excited?
Hopeful?
Curious?
Confident?
Anxious?
Frustration?
Overwhelm?
Fear?
Sad?
Critical?
Inferior?
Our brains are wired for safety,
for certainty and for comfort. So it makes total sense that stepping out of our comfort zone to try that new thing, to make a change from our existing habitual survival patterns would send the fear of God striking through our bones.
To the opposite, our brains are ever changing. They are constantly rewiring. Just because they are wired to fight, flight or freeze doesn’t mean that part has to take over. Of course, if we are standing nose to nose with a tiger, than yes for crying out loud, let our brain takeover. But most of the time, we aren’t nose to nose to a tiger. We are nose to nose with fear.
So what if we changed our relationship with fear in order to create more courage?
What if we stepped more into discomfort? What if we brought along fear with us and did it anyway? What would change in your life? What could change in your life?
Following my divorce I had the opportunity to play out my habitual patterns, the ones trying to keep me safe and comfortable. The stable desk job, the arms of another man, the path of buffering, numbing, distracting with the external luxuries of life…booze, shopping, business, more, more, more. My brain felt at home here. As I write this my heart beats with anticipation as I remember the moments of fear trying the new thing. Learning to be still, leaning into following my passion, leaning into the healing, growth and development of my soul rather than following the path of least resistance.
Now my fear is what if I had let fear win. What if I had chosen to stay comfortable. WOW! I would have missed out on this soul spewing journey of creating more courage, confidence and love for each experience I encounter.
We have this one life on earth as we know it. Everyday is a new opportunity to learn, to grow, to change. And yet so often the fear of discomfort keeps us complacent. The fear keeps us from living fully alive.
And then we have our fear stories, that try to keep us safe.
Fear is a sneaky little bastard. It can show up at anytime, unexpected and many times wearing a mask. So often that mask represents the stories we have made up in our minds about our past. The stories that keep us safe, but limit us from living who God intended us to be. The beautiful, soul driven human that we were brought into this world as.
One of my coaching clients expressed that she was not as far along as she wanted to be in life financially, relationally, emotionally. When asked why, she had this story of her past, her shitty ex husband, her divorce, her alcoholic mom. When she was able to get uncomfortable by bringing light to these past stories and how they playing out in her current life and keeping her stuck, she was able to begin creating new stories, beliefs and patterns to create what she craved most in life.
The reason why any of us aren’t as far along as we want to be whether it’s in our business, our financial situation, our weight loss, our happiness, our confidence is because we have chosen not to be uncomfortable.
The more we choose discomfort, the more we choose to put ourselves out there, the more we choose to try new things and be willing to fail at them over and over and notice how fear shows up in our thinking, in our physical bodies, the more successful, happy and content we’re going to be, in any area of our life.
So here is where fear is showing up and I’m doing it anyway…
As I deep dive into marketing uBwell. Fear stories are tugging hard at pulling up old behaviors, beliefs, thoughts, feelings. And that’s OK! I’m noticing them and doing it scared. I’m sharing what I know to be true. What I have studied, applied and live each day. I do this in the face of fear of rejection. fear of failure. fear of vulnerabilty. And I do it instead with the courage and confidence that it can help change one persons life for the better. If my showing up in the face of fear can give you a bit of courage to take that first step. To try something new. To face discomfort in order to grow you, it’s worth all the fear in the world.
That new thing can be whatever your heart desires.
Your new thing doesn’t have to be busting through a glass ceiling. It can be a small endeavor that speaks to you right now…a new hobby, a new habit, dating again, investing in the growth of you physically, spiritually or emotionally.
Today, all you have to do is decide that you will begin. Then each day after this, decide to begin again. One day at a time. Bring your attention, your awareness, into the present moment so that you can boldly and courageously follow your Heart and live your purpose in life one moment at a time.
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❤️AFFIRMATION:
I let go of my fear and courageously move forward with a peaceful heart.
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💭 HACK:
Start by bringing awareness to and getting curious with how fear shows up in your life.
Having the fear is natural. Letting it stop you from going after your dreams is a tragedy. So start to peel back the layers to identify what the belief is so you can uncover the truth you are not believing in that is causing the fear.
What are you most fearful of? Your biggest insecurity?
Where is this thought coming from?
When was the moment in your life that made you have this fear of…
Failure
Rejection
Abandonment
Intimacy
Success
Being broke
Losing Control
Not being good enough
How is it this fear showing up in your life?
How is it holding you back from being your best self and living your best life?
What do you have to believe in order to not have this fear?